This is a deep and somewhat odd topic for me to go off
on. I am sure by the end of this post I will have annoyed a few people, but
inspired others…I am writing for the ones who will be inspired…not annoyed
(sorry).
The other day during my bible study class we briefly
discussed the topic of having a testimony. I don’t know how it came up…I
probably brought it up as I do many off the topic conversations…God love the
women you put up with me every Sunday morning.
I was raised believing that I needed a good Testimony to be
taken seriously in church. An “introduce yourself” was a good five minute “let
me tell you the fires I’ve walked through to get here.” My belief has changed
some. I believe everyone has a story and many have a story where they came to
know God as their Lord in Savior. I envy (I know I shouldn’t envy, but…) those
who have known God from a young age and have stayed on their God path. I am who
I am due to my path straying, but I would love to know what’s it’s like to live
that life. While, I believe in having a story and sharing your story when you
feel called to, I don’t think that your testimony determines how much of a
Christian you are (not sure if that makes since to you or not).
I feel like I have been blessed (if you could call it that)
with three testimonies.
My first testimony was developed in my late teens it went
something like this: I started experimenting with alcohol and drugs at the
young at of fourteen. This along with a poor choice in friends led me to being
a high school drop out living in a station wagon on the beach at the age of
seventeen. I reached my breaking point and decided the drugs were not for me to
which my friends told me that I either did them or I should leave. I left. I
asked my family to move me back to Dallas
to stay with my Meme and they had me in a car in the next day (I love them
sooooo much for that). A short time later my best friend that I lived with in South Texas overdosed and almost lost her life that was a
huge confirmation to me that I did the right thing. I enrolled in high school
and wound up graduating on time because of how far ahead I was in school before
the drugs really took over. I worked hard and I overcame my mistakes…I did it…I
was a survivor.
My second testimony for my mid-twenties: I found myself
single and pregnant at the age of 23. I had a large weight of guilt and hardly
any self-worth. I met the woman who would be come one of my mentors and she
took me to a bible church and where they
welcomed the hot mess I had become with open arms. I threw myself in the word
and learned as much as I could about forgiveness. I had my daughter and raised
her as single parent depending primarily on my income with a little help from
my parents. I met a wonderful guy when I was 24 and we were married just before
I turned 27. I had a family. This in combination with my first testimony was a
good start for me…I felt like I had been through my share of issues and had a
story to share with the world.
Today (my 3rd testimony): After a bad breakup of
a not so great marriage I started over with a terrible fall. I had three of the
worst years of my life which led me to my knees one night alone in a house I
bought, but couldn’t stand to be in. Let me tell you that to me, my first two
testimonies are all about “me”, what I did that bettered my life, the steps
I took to overcome myself – this third one is all about God. I have
had huge dose of grace and restoration. The only person I credit my current
life to is My Lord and Savior! I have been given a restart on my life – I have
been forgiven for all my past digressions. It’s an amazing feeling and it’s
timely – I don’t think the twenty year old me could handle what all I’ve been
given in life.
I have been blessed with a husband who is so amazing. I can’t
put into words on most days what it has meant to have him. The Lord has blessed
me with a beautiful eleven year old daughter who has been so resilient through
all my trials. She’s what kept me going many days and now we are both being
blessed. I've been give the opportunity to have two more daughters – a big
responsibility that I am grateful to have in my thirties.
My excitement and my happiness with my life may be annoying
and fake to some people, but it’s so true and such awesome experience…I strongly
suggest seeking it out and giving it a try.
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